How to Text Girls: 14 Ways to Talk Smooth & Get Them Interested

To be successful in texting, you need to say the right thing at the right time, and this is your playbook for how to text girls.

Women receive a lot of texts from a lot of different men. I needed to tell you that. Because if you think you’re the first guy to text her, you’re not. Nor are you the last guy. Well, maybe you could be if you do it right. If you follow these tips for how to text girls, you’ll stand apart from the crowd.

She’s receiving so many messages from different guys whether over text or Instagram or Facebook that she’s overwhelmed and oversaturated with messages. At this point, she’s just declining or deleting messages, so, what you need to do is be that message she replies to. Sounds easy, right? [Read: A complete guide to texting before the first date]

How to texts girls and get them interested in you

Well, it’s not that easy. If you think saying, ‘did you fall from heaven?’ does the trick, here’s the thing, the other 100 guys thought the same thing and look where that got them. As a woman, I’m here to tell you that if you want to successfully text girls, you must follow some easy, yet important, tips.

These tips jump-start the conversation and, hopefully, you’ll be able to keep the conversation going. But most importantly, get a reply. I can’t do the talking for you!

#1 Don’t attack. I see this all the time. Instead of starting a conversation with the girl, the guy simply starts verbally throwing compliments or vulgar language at her. Listen, she’s a person. You bombarding her with messages telling her how amazing she is or how you want to see her naked isn’t going to get you anywhere. You got her number which is a big step. But this doesn’t mean you got yourself a date. [Read: 17 must-know rules for texting a girl]

#2 Get a conversation going. You want her to be involved in the conversation—just like having a conversation with her in person. Ask her questions but don’t list them off as if it’s an interview. Instead, make it an actual conversation between the two of you. Yes, you can flirt, but really this is about you trying to get to know her and vice versa. [Read: How to tell if a girl is flirting with you]

#3 Be flirty but don’t go all out. I know you probably have some corny lines hidden up your sleeve, but you don’t have to use them right now. Actually, please don’t use them. You can be flirty but you need to see her reaction to your comments. If you’re too flirtatious and she’s not feeling it, pull back. If you don’t, she’ll distance herself.

#4 Keep the conversation positive. No, you don’t need to sound like a motivational speaker, but the last thing you should talk about is how you can’t afford to pay your rent and how you had a fight with your brother last night. Yes, these are real problems and you can talk to her about it but not at this time, you just met her.

If you’re in a bad mood, don’t text her. Let a couple hours pass, it’s better to be silent than to sound like a dick. [Read: What to text a girl – Dos, don’ts and all the secrets to know]

#5 There’s a right time to text her. If you text her at midnight, she’s going to see it as a booty call. Now, if that’s what you want, text her at that time and she decides if she’s into that. But if you’re not looking for that, stay away from texting her when it’s late at night or if you know she’s out with her friends or family.

#6 You don’t have to text her all the time. This seems to be a common mistake when people start texting with someone. They feel if they’re not texting them then there’s a chance the person will lose interest. You know what loses my interest? When the guy is always texting me. Don’t you work or go to school? Don’t you have things to do? Show her that you have a life. [Read: How to text a girl without creeping her out]

#7 Put yourself in her point of view. When you text a girl, think about how you would react if you were her. How would you feel if you were sent a dick pic out of nowhere? Probably not that good. So, don’t send her one.

You may think that telling her you want to smack her ass is cute, but think about it from her angle. Is it really that cute? Is it? It’s time to become aware of what you’re saying.

#8 Stay away from boring questions. You ask yourself, what’s a boring question? Well, here are some of them—don’t use them often. “What’s up?” “How’s it going?” “What are you doing?” Though they’re questions, they’re not really questions that go anywhere unless you ask her out. [Read: 18 casual things to text a girl and leave her addicted to you]

#9 You can end the conversation. You don’t need to continue the conversation for hours and hours. Sometimes the best conversations are short, sweet, and to the point. If you notice the conversation dying down, let it die!

If you continue the conversation she’ll eventually get bored—unless there’s a point to it. End the idea of having long, non-stop endless conversations, just ask her out for dinner instead.

#10 Keep your eye on the goal. Your goal is to ask her out, right? Your goal isn’t to talk to her via text message for the rest of your life. Keep that goal in mind. Many guys get easily lost in the whole texting world and just become another guy she texts when she’s bored. She probably would have gone on a date with you, but you never asked. [Read: 7 steps to asking a girl out over text and get a yes]

#11 Go easy on the emojis. When it comes to knowing how to text girls, remember that they like to use emojis but that doesn’t mean you have to. Sure, you can use an emoji to make it clear you’re joking or flirting but other than that, don’t make your text look like a picture book. It’s not cute. And if you’re reading this, you’re not two-years-old. [Read: How to decode emojis and use the right ones]

#12 Keep the texts short. This isn’t history class, so there’s no need to write her an essay on what you did today. Honestly, she doesn’t care, she’s just making small talk. So, bypass that and tell her something funny or interesting that you saw today. Get her involved in the conversation. Don’t list off things you did in a long text. Keep it short and to the point.

#13 Texting isn’t to show who you are. If you want to show her who you are, you ask her out on a date and meet up with her in person. Now, if you want to ask her out on a date then you text her. There’s no need to try to show her how funny you are or attempt to build some emotional connection via texting. This is just a tool to get her on a date with you. [Read: 30 things to talk about on a first date when you’re tongue tied]

#14 Make her comfortable by meeting her in person. Listen, if you think you make her comfortable by talking via text, you’re wrong. She’ll never be fully comfortable with you because she hasn’t seen you in person, other than the time you took her number. If you want her to get to know you, take the step and ask her out.

Now that you know what you should and shouldn’t do when it comes to knowing how to text girls, apply these tips to your next conversation. You’ll see the difference.