If you are too nervous to ask your crush out, the next best thing would be to learn how to get your crush to ask you out. Squash your nerves and go for it!
There are a lot of reasons you might get too nervous to ask your crush out. You might be afraid of rejection. The moment itself may frighten you. Or you could be worried you’ll stumble over your words. But what if you could flip it, and learn how to get your crush to ask you out instead?!
Firstly, well, I get it. I’ve been there myself. Once I even got a friend to get a guy’s number for me so I could ask him out via text instead of just walking up to him. We all know how it feels.
But, if you don’t want to take that dive into the deep end, you’re in luck. Instead of asking out your crush, you can learn how to get your crush to ask you out. [Read: Tame the jitters and just ask out your crush]
How to get your crush to ask you out: Plant the seed
First things first, if you want to convince someone to ask you out, calm their insecurities and any doubts they may have. Pretty much remove all the reasons you didn’t ask them out from the equation.
How do you do that?
#1 Make sure they know you’re available. If someone wants to ask you out, one major reason they won’t is that they don’t know if you’re available. So, if you want your crush to know you are single and ready to mingle, just say so.
You don’t want to just walk up to them and say “I’m single,” because at that point you might as well just ask them out. Instead, mention how it has been forever since you’ve been on a good date. Subtle hints are the way to go. [Read: The 15 subtle signs someone likes you back]
#2 Let them know what you like to do. If you do all the heavy lifting subtly, your crush will only have one question to ask when the time to ask you outcomes. So, let them know what you’d like to do on a date.
Tell them about a new release you’ve been wanting to see, a fusion restaurant you want to try, or even a museum or hiking trail you’re interested in. This will plant the seed for date ideas. [Read: 15 guaranteed ways to get your crush to like you back]
#3 Hint that you like them. Another reason people hesitate asking someone out is the fear of rejection. It is probably one of the reasons you don’t want to do it. So, let them know that you wouldn’t reject them.
You can say something like, “why can’t I meet a guy/girl like you.” You could even ask them how their dating life is going. All of this will give them subtle clues to ask you out.
Even if it is a little abstract, these conversations will put you and dating in your crush’s head at the same time which is a good starter. [Read: These intense signs of chemistry reveal an instant connection]
How to get your crush to ask you out: Water the seed
Now that you have introduced the idea of you and dating in the same sentence to your crush, it is going to get more realistic.
You have planted the seed in your crush’s mind. If you want it to sprout, work on more methods that will affect more than just their mind. The following ways to get your crush to ask you out include more subconscious hints. These hints will make them think of you romantically without realizing you had anything to do with it.
#1 Flirt. Flirting is an ideal way to hint that you’re interested without being too obvious. Because flirting can be friendly or more, they may not read between the lines but they will get the picture.
Joke with them, tease them a bit, and show off your best assets. [Read: 15 subtle flirting moves to bring them closer than ever]
#2 Include them in group activities. If you don’t want to ask them out on a date, ask them to do group activities that give you more time to spend together. Say you invite your crush to a bowling game but spend most of your time together. They will see where your attention lies.
#3 Use your body language. Body language is the strong, silent way to get your crush to ask you out. By crossing your legs towards them, making eye contact, rubbing their arm when they make you laugh, you aren’t saying anything but also saying everything all at once.
These small touches don’t also click in the brain, but they are an emotional door into their subconscious.[Read: 20 subconscious signs of attraction that show up between two people]
How to get your crush to ask you out: Watch it grow
Now is when you take the final few steps to ensure your crush will ask you out. In other words, these tricks should seal the deal.
#1 Show your interest. I know I already said something along these lines, but this time you’ll be a lot less subtle about it. Instead of hinting at your interest in your crush, ask them questions.
Try to get to know them better as you would if you were on a date. By getting emotionally close by talking about their family, past, or passions, you show you care and want to learn more. [Read: 40 questions to ask your crush and subtly flirt with them]
#2 Do other things together. If a date is your end goal, do other things together. Just don’t call it a date. It may slowly turn into that without anyone having to actually ask out the other. Now I am not saying you should casually show up to a five-star restaurant together.
But, you can go hiking together, shopping, or even help them build a piece of IKEA furniture. All of these things can help you get closer and bond. By doing this you still get the benefits of a date, without all the pressure.
#3 Dress up. You are at the end of the ninth inning. The score is tied up. Time to do something big. You want to get your crush’s attention so they really see you as someone they could date.
I am not saying you need a makeover, but do something a little out of the ordinary. Style your hair differently, spray some perfume or cologne, buy a new outfit. Do something that will give them the feeling of a cartoon character’s jaw hitting the floor and hearts shooting out of their eyes. [Read: How to fall in love with the sexy side of you]
#4 Walk away if you needed. Finally, when you want to get your crush to ask you out, you can do everything up until actually asking them out yourself. But, sometimes they just don’t get it. Some people are oblivious, others sadly, just are not interested.
If you’ve tried it all and waited patiently, finally take the plunge and ask your crush out yourself or give up. [Read: How to ask a friend out without risking the friendship]
I hate advising someone to give up. Sometimes that is the only answer. If you have done all of this and still haven’t received an invite to dinner and a movie, they may just not be into you. You’ve made it clear you’re interested. If they aren’t, they won’t make a move.
This is when you decide to take a risk or move on.
Learning how to get your crush to ask you out is easier than you’d think. But be prepared for any outcome as nothing is foolproof.