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Have a boss you can’t stand? A boyfriend who loves the mirror more than you? These red flags are telling signs of a narcissistic man.
It’s not easy figuring out whether someone is narcissistic or not. People love to throw labels onto others, but it’s trickier than it looks to recognize the signs of a narcissistic man.
I mean, there aren’t any tests you can take to show you whether or not you’re a narcissist. Basically, it can only be figured out by examining someone’s behavior. If you’re a narcissist, you can do a pretty good job of hiding your true self.
If you’re dating or working with someone who’s a narcissist, you’re around them all the time. Eventually, their true colors will show. But if you’re reading this, I have a feeling you’re noticing some red flags you want answers to. [Read: 12 signs of a narcissist and 5 ways to break up with them]
15 clear signs of a narcissistic man
The good thing about your situation? You’re here and desire to learn more about narcissistic men. I wish I had someone to talk to about this in my past. Let me tell you, I was a magnet for narcissistic men. I struggled with my self-esteem, shy to voice my opinion to guys I liked, and I just wanted to be loved by someone. I was a perfect tool.
But you don’t need to waste your time talking to narcissistic men. I don’t want you to go through the same experiences. Instead, learn to read the signs of a narcissistic man and make a decision about this guy. Is he narcissistic or not? If he is, run. And run fast.
Do you surround yourself with narcissistic men?
#1 He loves the spotlight. When you talk together or with a group of friends, he loves the spotlight. The conversation cannot be on anyone else but him. You may have had a bad day at work, but he wouldn’t know because he doesn’t give you the chance to speak. [Read: Subtle signs you’re being manipulated by your lover]
#2 He’s all about success. His goal in life is to be admired by others. Even if he’s in debt up to his neck, that doesn’t matter just as long as other people see him with a fancy car and expensive clothes. He’s all about the image and will do whatever he must to achieve it.
#3 He doesn’t have many friends. At least old friends. He has friends or acquaintances that are relatively new in his life, but other than that, his older friends are nowhere to be seen. That’s the problem with narcissistic men; they can’t retain long-term relationships, because, eventually, people see through them. So, most of their friendships are short and sweet. [Read: What is a narcissistic man like and ways to recognize his rotten core]
#4 He’s not empathetic. If you thought he was considerate and kind, well, think again. One of the clearest signs of a narcissistic man is that he is as shallow as a kiddy pool. Narcissists usually lack empathy because they’re unable to understand the concept of feelings. Crazy, right? They can try to show empathy, but because it’s not in them, it looks unnatural. [Read: How to tell if someone doesn’t have empathy and what to do next]
#5 He’s very charming… in the beginning. When you first met him, he charmed your pants off. The guy was so smooth; he blew your mind. But that was only in the beginning. Narcissists are highly skilled in charming people around them, but only for a short period of time. Once the conversation gets to a deeper level, they’re unable to hold it.
#6 He can’t commit. Ah yes, this old trick. Listen, he’ll never really like you because he can’t have feelings for anyone but himself. So, if you’re waiting for him to commit to a relationship, think again. This isn’t going to happen. He’ll date you, stick by you, but the minute something better comes up, you’re done. [Read: A relationship with a narcissist and what it means to love one]
#7 Have you tried breaking up with him? And how did that go? Did he panic and beg for you to not break up with him? Narcissistic men will feed you everything you need to hear to keep you around. But when you get back together with him, he’ll go back to his old ways. He was never planning on changing, but he knew that’s what you wanted to hear.
#8 He needs constant compliments. If you didn’t notice, everything they do is based on validation. If he does something nice, it’s because he wants to be seen as kind-hearted; not because he actually is. He loves getting compliments and will constantly fish for praise. This is because a narcissistic man has low self-esteem.
#9 He has no boundaries. Usually, you have your own set of boundaries that help you measure the boundaries of other people. But with him, he has no boundaries. Everything belongs to him, and everyone thinks and feels the same way as him. This sounds a lot like a toddler, to be honest. And this is why they freak out when you show them boundaries that are different from their own. [Read: How to set boundaries with a narcissist and weaken their hold over you]
#10 He loves to gaslight. A narcissistic man will never take responsibility for something wrong they said. So, instead, they gaslight you. It’s a form of manipulation and emotional abuse. They’ll feed you a couple of lies and then spin it against you, distorting your reality. That way, you become dependent on them and decrease trust in yourself. [Read: Gaslighting: Is your lover playing mind games with you?]
#11 He’s a Debbie Downer. Though at first, he came off as charming and charismatic, he’s actually a negative person. Narcissistic men love to spread negativity around to gain attention from others. They will throw tantrums, tell sad stories, and become “emotional” when they need the spotlight.
#12 He’s right about everything. At least he thinks he is. He will never be wrong about anything. Even if he knows he’s wrong, he’ll spin it to put the blame on anyone else but him. There’s no point debating or arguing with a narcissistic man. At the end of the day, he’s always right.
#13 They become aggressive. If you’ve tried cutting ties with him seriously, he didn’t take it well. Instead, he became aggressive and lashed out. These are classic signs of a narcissistic man and huge warning flags of a potential future full of verbal, emotional, and physical abuse.
#14 He has a split personality. A narcissistic man has a dual personality that splits into good and bad. All their negative feelings are placed on other people, and when something good happens, they take the credit for everything. You can see how that can be an issue in any relationship. [Read: How to deal with a narcissistic boyfriend and protect your heart]
#15 He can’t be vulnerable. Because he lacks empathy, he’ll never be able to open up and be vulnerable with you. Therefore, you can never be emotionally close to a narcissistic man. And with a guy like that, would you even want to be?[Read: Why narcissists ignore texts and do the hurtful things they do]
It’s not always easy figuring out if someone you know is narcissistic. But once you go through the signs of a narcissistic man, you’ll pinpoint their behavior with ease.