13 Sweet Signs He’s Making Love to You Vs. Having Sex with You

Making love and having sex are not the same thing. Anyone can have sex, but if you see the signs he’s making love to you, it means a deeper connection.

Let’s be honest for a second—literally anyone can have sex. It doesn’t matter the gender or age; anyone can have sex with someone else. But not everyone can make love to someone else. If you want to know the signs he’s making love to you, first you must understand the differences between making love and having sex.

Making love involves intimacy. Having sex, well, you don’t need a high level of emotional connection to get the job done. Sex is just sex. There’s an attraction between people and sexual tension, and you don’t need to know much about your partner to feel that. But making love isn’t the same.

13 signs he’s making love to you

To make love with someone, there’s a deeper connection and more intimacy. You may be unsure of what’s happening in your relationship if it’s a new relationship because the two look and feel similar.

[Read: Does it matter if you’re making love or having sex?]

Maybe you haven’t gotten to the place where you can speak more openly about the relationship and see how your partner’s feeling. If you’re not at that point, but you feel comfortable talking about it, use these signs to tell the difference and guide you through your feelings.

Let’s get to the truth of lovemaking.

#1 You are really into kissing. Is it hot in here or is it just me? With lovemaking, there’s a lot of kissing involved. Don’t underestimate kissing; it’s very intimate and sensual. If there’s no kissing, there’s no lovemaking—bottom line. [Read: 12 sensual moves to do while kissing that are guaranteed to turn a guy on]

#2 There’s a lot of eye contact. If there’s one thing we can all agree on, it’s that lovemaking is all about eye contact. If he’s avoiding eye contact, something’s wrong. If he wants to make love with you, he’ll make sure you see he’s looking into your eyes. He wants you to make sure you’re enjoying the experience just as much as he is.

#3 Heavy on the foreplay. Lovemaking isn’t just sex. Lovemaking is all about the foreplay; that’s where the magic really happens. If he really wants to make love with you, he’ll be taking his time through foreplay and exploring every inch of your body because he knows if you’re going to orgasm, it’s all about the foreplay. [Read: All the passionate secrets you should know for sexy lovemaking]

#4 He wants to please you. Lovemaking isn’t just about him ejaculating; it’s about the two of you experiencing pleasure. If he is really making love to you, he’ll focus on making sure you receive pleasure as well. He wants his partner to be satisfied, so he’ll put in the extra effort. 

#5 What are the usual positions? If he only has sex with you doggy-style, odds are you aren’t making love. The positions he uses when making love are important. Lovemaking is about eye contact and intensity. Of course, if the sex makes its way into doggy-style, that’s fine. But usually, lovemaking is done in missionary or cowgirl – face to face positions. [Read: 10 intimate sex positions to really create romance in the bedroom] 

#6 He likes to take things slow. Lovemaking can be fast-paced, but it’s usually slow and sensual. He’s not going to rush through the experience; he’ll want to take it nice and slow. If he wants to make love with you, he’ll want to make it last as long as possible.

#7 He’s honest with you. If a man really wants to be with someone or make love with someone, they’re honest. He’s not interested in playing games with you; he wants to be himself around you, which is an important sign. [Read: 32 weird, true psychological facts about love you should know] 

#8 You feel more vulnerable. Making love to someone means you’re letting someone in *not physically speaking*. You’re opening yourself up to this person and giving yourself to them. And if you want to make love with someone, this is something you must do. 

#9 You don’t necessarily always have sex. When you hang out with each other, it doesn’t necessarily end up with sex. But, you’re hanging out with him, there’s not this expectation for sex to happen. This means, though he enjoys sex, he also enjoys spending time with you and getting to know you.

#10 How do you feel? When you’re around him, you don’t feel this pressure to impress him, nor do you feel insecure. There’s a feeling of less pressure, and you feel more comfortable with your sexual preferences and share them with him. [Read: What a good sex life should look like in real life]

#11 There’s not so much dirty talk. People who are into you can still talk dirty, but that’s usually kept for sex. During foreplay, he’s into the sweet talk. While he’s exploring your body, he’s giving you sensual and sweet compliments, and he’s not looking to be mean or insult you.

#12 You have after-sex cuddles. Some people aren’t into after-sex cuddles; some people need some space, which doesn’t mean they’re not into you. But he loves to cuddle with you after sex and wants to hold you tight in his arms. [Read: The 9 big emotional needs in a relationship that is the glue holding it all together]

#13 You feel a mental connection. Lovemaking means there’s a mental connection between you two. You’re connected with him, and when you have sex with him, you feel loved and connected. You’re the only person who can know if you have those feelings or not.

[Read: The tenets needed for unforgettable lovemaking]

There’s a huge difference between sex and making love. And now, you know the signs he’s making love to you. So, is he making love with you?