One of the most highly researched things in the field of psychology is why and…
When you’re worried about you and your partner, these signs a relationship will not last should help you get the clarity you need.
All relationships go through ups and downs. Some things that you may think are signs a relationship will not last could just be passing moments, and things you believe are keeping you together could be tearing you apart.
So many relationships end abruptly. It makes the heartbreak worse. You go through a stage of shock before even getting to mourning the loss of the relationship.
To avoid that and perhaps handle a breakup more smoothly, learn how to spot the signs a relationship won’t last or at least not continue happily. This can help things end easier. If you figure out these signs soon enough, you may be able to work to make things better.
So, how do you know the signs a relationship will not last?[Read: These committed relationship rules will help your romance last a lifetime]
Looking for signs a relationship will not last
Real quick, before we get into signs a relationship won’t last, all of these things can be sorted if you and your partner both want to make your relationship healthier.
Just because you show these signs, it doesn’t necessarily mean you’re doomed. At the same time, if you don’t notice these things in your relationship, it doesn’t mean things are perfect. You came looking for this article, and it tells me you may be looking for a way out of your relationship. That alone is a reason it won’t last. [Read: Subtle signs you subconsciously want to end your relationship]
You don’t need to be in a miserable or doomed relationship for it not to work. Just being unhappy or feeling mediocre about it is enough.
When you are looking for signs a relationship won’t last without noticing them beforehand, you may be hoping it won’t last and just looking for a more prominent reason than that you aren’t happy.
But, being unhappy in a relationship even without dysfunction is a good enough reason to end it.[Read: Are you settling in an unhappy relationship?]
The most obvious signs a relationship will not last
Now that you have a bit more clarity, these are some of the reasons a relationship will not last. Remember, they are not all 100% certainties, and if you don’t notice these, it doesn’t necessarily mean you’re good to go.
The signs a relationship will not last are not sure things. However, they can clue you into the deeper aspects of your relationship so you can decide whether to try harder or cut your losses now.
#1 You spend all your time together. You might think this sounds like a happy relationship, but couples that ditch plans with friends for each other even up becoming codependent. When you only rely on each other for all your needs, things get really dysfunctional. [Read: The 11 signs your couple time is too much!]
#2 You can’t be yourself. If you feel like your partner judges you, you’ll never truly be happy with them. You’ll question what you say or do around them. It isn’t about hurting their feelings, it’s about you. Being with someone when you can’t be yourself can make you question yourself.
#3 You don’t talk enough. So the chemistry is there, but you never talk? That’s nice for a fling or if you don’t want an actual relationship, but that isn’t sustainable.
If you don’t talk about important things, you’ll never grow together or really be a partnership. [Read: What is lust? Can you turn it into love?]
#4 You don’t like or trust their friends. Who your partner is friends with says a lot about them. The people you surround yourself with influence you. If you don’t like or trust your partner’s friends, what does it say about them? Are they a different person around you versus them? Why don’t you trust them?
#5 You’ve changed for them. Whether you’ve decided to live in the city when you hate it or kept your hair long because they prefer it, letting them change you on any level can be very unhealthy. Eventually, it will get to you because you could lose yourself in the relationship. [Read: 10 decisions you should never allow your partner to make for you]
#6 You’re not equals. A relationship needs to have respect. You must respect each other. Each of your opinions should be taken into account for big decisions. If your partner talks down to you or ignores what you have to say, things are wildly unbalanced and that won’t work for long.
#7 You want to fix them. You adore your boo. They are funny and charming and great in bed. But they never text back, cancel plans last minute, and leave you waiting around.
These are behaviors you cannot change. All the things you love about them and all the good times will not change them. You cannot fix someone who doesn’t want to be fixed. [Read: How to know for sure if you’re settling in an unhappy relationship]
#8 One or both of you are hung up on the past. Still not over an ex? Are they letting their past relationship dictate how yours goes? That will not work. Say their ex cheated on them. Now they feel the need to control everything you do and have to know where you are at all times. That is not okay.
Or maybe you never quite got over your ex. If you’re considering reaching out, you’re not fully invested. [Read: How to know if a past relationship is still holding you back]
#9 Jealousy is taking over. Everyone gets jealous once in a while. Maybe you’re jealous of their friends or their job or their cute coworker. That is okay. As long as you communicate it, and are reassured.
But, if you are letting your jealousy occupy your relationship, things will go south quickly. Remember in Friends when Ross was jealous of Rachel’s coworker Mark and the time she was spending at work? That didn’t work out too well for him, did it?
#10 You don’t trust each other. Trust is so important in a relationship. It is what keeps you coming back to each other at the end of a hard day or after an argument. It is what makes your relationship add to your life instead of taking from it.
Without it, a relationship is dysfunctional, unhealthy, and unlikely to last.
#11 You’re embarrassed by them or their behavior. This isn’t about being embarrassed by their poor dance moves, but of them as a person. Maybe you think they don’t make enough money or aren’t smart enough. These things will not go away with time. [Read: How to know when a relationship isn’t working]
#12 You’re holding back. If you feel like you can’t share how you feel whether it’s positive or negative, that most likely won’t get better. When you feel like you can’t speak up with the person you’re in a relationship with it will only get worse. [Read: Are you walking on egg shells in your love life?]
#13 You never compromise. Whether it is you or your partner who isn’t willing to meet halfway, never doing that could cause a real rift between you two. Maybe you could switch who picks what’s for dinner or what movie to watch or whose family to spend the holidays with. If you decide to spend the holidays apart or watch separate movies and continue on that path, it will tear you apart rather than bring you together.[Read: The 7 non-negotiables you should never compromise on in your relationship]
These signs a relationship will not last may have clued you into the reality of your own relationship. Give these a thought, and ask yourself if you like the direction your relationship is heading, and take a decision.