Having feelings for someone that doesn’t share them or that you shouldn’t necessarily be having…
What does it feel like to be in love? I thought that this might be a hard subject to cover. I mean, have you ever had someone describe what having a fever feels like? That is kind of like asking what does it feel like to be in love. The experience for everyone is so different.
Love can be intense, and other times it can be calming. It can be overwhelming or perfect. Love can be so subtle you don’t realize you’re feeling it. Or it can knock you right off your feet.
What is love?
You might think you know what love is. It is how you feel about your family and friends. It is more intense than liking someone.
Love is essentially an intense feeling of affection. But, what does that mean? Is love uncontrollable? Do you decide to love? Does it just happen to you? Is love unconditional?
Yes and no, to all of these. Love is so many things to so many people. It feels so different to everyone. Being in love is also so different than loving platonically or within your family.
The connection you make with someone you’re in love with is transformative. It can be amazing or awful. It can feel like a drug, or it can hurt.
Whether you don’t know if you’re in love or you just want to be able to describe it, read on to know what it feels like to be in love.
What does it feel like to be in love?
Love is not a simple thing to explain. It isn’t something you can put into words so easily.
There are hundreds if not thousands of poems and songs written about love. It goes beyond a simple definition. Love just isn’t so simple. That is why we need more than a line or two to really explain what it feels like to be in love.
1. You think about them
When you’re in love, you think about them not just when they’re across the table from you but even when they’re not there. You may even think more about them where you’re apart. It is the strangest feeling. It is like you have a longing in your soul for the person you love.
Even though they aren’t physically next to you, you feel their presence in the good times and the bad when you are in love. This is why they are typically the first person you want to contact when something major happens.
Almost like a guardian angel on your shoulder, they reside in your heart when you are in love, which makes them with you always.
2. You feel their pain
When you love someone, and they hurt, you hurt for and with them. A step above empathy, it is almost like they are an extension of you.
It hurts you to see them hurting no matter what the reason is. You don’t want them to cry. You aren’t uncomfortable when they’re upset, but physically feel like you would do anything for them to be happy.
When you are in love, you feel this absolute obligation to defend them both emotionally and physically. So, if they are wounded, you feel it too.
3. You can’t make sense of it
You can’t quite describe it. If someone asks you why you love this person, you could list all of their amazing qualities but that still doesn’t cut it. You want to list their quirks too. You love them for reasons that don’t quite make sense.
When you’re in love, you will risk your life for them. It doesn’t matter that you can’t explain it in any scientific or mathematical way. You know it is there. Being in love doesn’t have to make sense.
4. You picture your future with them
When you realize that you love someone, it is like the world opens up and you see all the things in your future that you want. Almost like the missing piece to your puzzle, when you love someone, it makes everything fall into place.
You finally see what your future might look like. Picturing growing old doesn’t seem so bad. Being in love is like finally learning what you didn’t know you were missing. There aren’t so many question marks in your life because you have a solid piece that you know you want to be there forever.
5. You’re happy to compromise
When you are in love, you are okay with sacrificing your needs and wants for someone else. When you’re single, giving up watching your favorite TV show live seems like something you wouldn’t do for anyone. But, once you’re in love, it doesn’t seem to matter. You want to make them happy before yourself.
In the end, as much as you think you want or need something, seeing their face happy suddenly trumps all the things that make you happy.
Of course, a healthy version of love makes you both happy, but compromise is about meeting halfway, and that doesn’t seem to be too hard with this person.
6. You want them to be happy
Being in love brings out this need to please, and to be loved back. You want to be enough for them and be able to make them happy. Even if you were always a little selfish, being in love makes you change.
That is why if someone you love is upset with you or finds out something about you that might change their opinion of you, it is devastating. You want the person you are in love with to love and respect you wholeheartedly. You care very much about what they think and want them to see you as a good person and worthy of their love.
7. It feels different
Love feels like you are complete for the first time. Whether this is your first time being in love or not, it always feels different. You can barely compare it to another relationship. It isn’t recognizable.
You may have thought you were in love before, but this time you know for sure. This feeling can’t be filled with money or success. Being in love feels different in an indescribable way. When you know, you know.
8. You’re comforted
When you are in love, it is like someone filling up your emotional tank. Suddenly, all the loneliness you feel is gone. It isn’t just you against the world anymore. You feel like you always have a safe place to go. There is someone in your life you click and connect with so well that you feel comforted knowing you can just sit with them and feel at peace.
You also feel like you are finally yourself. You can relax with this person. When you’re in love, you aren’t just admiring someone. You love them because of what you know about them and how you feel about them. That offers you comfort that nothing else can.
9. You see things differently
Being in love is like taking your first real breath of oxygen or seeing color for the first time.
It breathes new life into your emotions, and you feel everything at once. Sure, it can be overwhelming, but it is also the most amazing and life-affirming feeling life has to offer.
You may feel less bothered by traffic or daily stress. This person is available to talk to at the end of the day. Just thinking about kissing them when you get home can take a bad day and make it so much more hopeful.
10. It can be scary
With all the goodness of love, it is balanced with some bad. Being in love is such a good feeling, that the risk of losing it is like nothing else. You get scared. Sure, being lonely sucks, but losing a great love is worse.
Once you fall in love, the fear of losing that person is terrifying. This is a terrifying thing. That fear is what makes you jealous, neurotic, and controlling. But, with true love comes trust and confidence. When you have all those together, there is no need for fear.
Being in love is like seeing color for the first time. Everything you see changes and comes to life. Of course, nothing will ever be the same once you experience love. But, that is a good thing.
If you love someone, keep them close to your heart. You are lucky to have felt this feeling. You can make it last and it can be wonderful.