How to Start a Conversation on Tinder: 20 Must-Know Rules to Follow

Although talking on Tinder may not be as nerve-racking as talking in person, it is still nice to know how to start a conversation on Tinder.

At one time, this article would have been about how to approach a stranger at the bar. Nowadays, Tinder is the new bar. It is where you create connections, so learning how to start a conversation on Tinder is important.

Because, without face to face contact, the conversation really needs to be great in order for anything to come from it. So, how do you make it great?

Well, there are always options when it comes to starting a conversation on Tinder. You can be deep, funny, or totally original. What’s important is that you start your Tinder conversation in a way that feels true to you. [Read: How to use tinder – A guide for true love or a perfect hookup]

Why it is so important how you start a conversation on Tinder

You might think the opening sentence on Tinder is just a few words and what comes after is more important, but that is not always the case. In today’s culture, people want to feel a connection ASAP.

It doesn’t seem exactly fair but first impressions are important. If you don’t draw positive attention quickly, Tinder is full of more people. Some people, of course, will try to get to know you even if your opening line is “Hey.” Others will move on to find something a bit more unique.

Think of Tinder as a first date. Although it is virtual, you still want to put in the same effort you would on a date. Try to share something personal, ask something that sparks intrigue, or even make a joke.

Try not to let this put pressure on you though. There is no need to be worried or concerned that what you said wasn’t perfect. Not everyone will click with you and that is okay. Plus, just as they can move on, so can you.

That is the benefit of a dating app like Tinder, there is always someone else on the horizon. [Read: 8 great reasons online dating is worth a shot]

How to start a conversation on Tinder

Now that you know why knowing how to start a conversation on Tinder is so important,  you can go into it with boldness and originality.

Being able to start a conversation on Tinder is all about making an impact. You don’t want to go in with something that doesn’t require a response or can be answered with a simple yes or no.

So, here on some ideas you can use or just pull inspiration from.

#1 Respond to their profile. This is probably the easiest way to start a conversation on Tinder. Instead of trying to come up with something unique and original on your own, pull from what you already know about them.

If they mentioned they are into travel or photography, strike up a conversation about cameras or their favorite place to travel. [Read: How to start a conversation on Tinder and snag a date every time]

#2 Ask about one of their photos. Some people leave their bios blank which gives you a lack of material to work with, but there are always photos. Hopefully, they are not all selfies and you can ask about them.

Ask where their hiking photo was taken, how old their dog is, or anything else pertaining to a specific photo. They chose those specific photos to intrigue potential matches, so show them it worked.

#3 Play a game. You may have taken a break from using games to break the ice since the first day of high school, but these tricks work. They distract you from the fact that this is sort of awkward and just let you get to know each other.

Try something like Two truths and a Lie or 20 Questions.

#4 Quote a movie or TV show. This is a great way to see if your tastes line up. Ask them to guess where the quote is from or just see if they recognize it. You can use a line from your favorite show like The Office or classic movie like The Breakfast Club.

You can even copy a show like Master of None on Netflix. Take Aziz Ansari’s favorite line, “Going to Whole Foods, want me to pick you up anything?” [Read: 21 Tinder conversation starters that’ll intrigue anyone instantly]

#5 Ask what their dream date is. Whether you want to chat for a while first or meet up quickly, this is a great way to start a conversation on Tinder. You get to know the vibe they are going for and if it is something you would enjoy.

And if you want to meet up, it is a great segue. [Read: Online dating success? Meet your date in person soon]

#6 Ask about the most spontaneous thing they have ever done. Starting a conversation on Tinder with this question gets things off on a light note. You can talk about your bucket list and how adventurous you are or aren’t.

#7 Ask what they’re looking for. I know this seems obvious, but when it comes to knowing how to start a conversation on Tinder, not many people ask this until they meet or even later than that. If you are on Tinder for a hook up, make sure the person you’re interested in wants the same thing or else it will get complicated later.

#8 Ask their opinion on a classic debate. Do they prefer peanut butter or jelly? Do they hang the toilet paper over or under? These are things everyone has a feeling about one way or the other. Starting things off with a friendly debate always heats things up.

#9 Ask what best pickup line they’ve ever heard. This is sure to be a funny way to start a conversation on Tinder. You can trade hilarious or cheesy pickup lines. See which catches your fancy. [Read: 70 hilarious cheesy pick up lines that’ll get anyone laughing]

#10 What is the best show to binge? Television is a big part of pop culture today. Sharing your interests and preferences can let you know if you would get along. And even if this isn’t a match made in Netflix heaven, you might get some good TV recommendations out of it.

#11 What is their dream vacation? Just about everyone on Tinder says they love to travel, but that is quite a bit vague. Ask them where they would love to travel to. Then, ask if they have any plans to go there. And if you’ve been there, offer some pointers.

#12 Compliment them. This is always a go-to. You can compliment their smile, style, or bio. Just be sure to follow up that comment with a question like, “I love your style, how did you get so cool?” [Read: How to flirt and intrigue someone with only your written words]

#13 Use a GIF. Emojis and GIFs are at your disposal so use what you have. Ask a question and throw in a funny GIF or even a meme to help drive your point home.

#14 Ask a multiple choice question. This is something that I have recently seen. It is such a unique way to get to know someone. Instead of an open-ended question, ask something and give them options for an answer.

Ask them the vibe they like on weekends. Do they prefer to be a. lazy, b. party, c. productive, or d. all of the above.

#15 Check for typos. Proper grammar and spelling show intellect and also how much you care about what you are saying. Be sure to double check for typos and grammatical errors. I know it seems minute, but this is a real turn-off for a lot of people.

#16 Message when you have time to talk. Try not to message someone and start a conversation on your way to work or before you go to sleep. Message when you actually have the time to go back and forth and really carry out a conversation. [Read: 15 Tinder tips you cannot ignore if you ever want a date]

#17 Don’t get too personal too quickly. When it comes to learning how to start a conversation on Tinder, it can be tempting to open yourself up to someone when you feel a connection straight off the bat. Hold back at least a little bit. Although Tinder has formed some amazing bonds, there are still a lot of ghosters out there.

You do not want to tell someone everything about yourself only for them to disappear.

#18 Don’t use their name in your message. Apparently, some people find this to be sincere, but I think most people find it creepy. When someone says something like, “Hi Samantha, you’re really cute.” I don’t know why, but it is creepy to me.

Think about it. How often do you use someone’s name in a message to them?

#19 Only follow-up once. Sure, sometimes Tinder doesn’t notify people or they are busy and forget to respond. So, go ahead and follow-up. Do not resend the same message but add a meme or GIF about two to four hours after the initial message. If there is still no response, let it go. [Read: 6 rules double texting rules everyone needs to follow]

#20 Play it cool. Remember that the person you are starting a conversation with on Tinder is probably not your lifelong crush. It is someone that you thought looked cool from a few sentences and a few photos. Don’t freak out. There is no need to be nervous.

[Read: How to make yourself standout on Tinder with these conversation starters]

Now that you know how to start a conversation on Tinder, go out with confidence. Time to get yourself a Tinder date.