How to Get Someone to Break Up with You If You Can’t Do It Yourself

No one said ending a relationship was easy. In fact, most of us wish to learn how to get someone to break up with you instead.

Breaking up with someone is never easy regardless of your reasons why. But if you feel the relationship has run its course then you’re most likely right. But you don’t want to do the dirty deed, instead you want to know how to get someone to break up with you.

Even though you want to end things, how are you going to do it? I once dumped a guy over the phone after telling him that he’s more like a brother figure—ouch. Mind you, I was young and clueless about the whole break up protocol.

But, even though I wanted to end it, it was a hard move to make. Sometimes, we stay in a relationship longer because we’re terrified of making that step. But listen, the time is now. You can do it. [Read: The signs it’s time to break up even if it is hard]

How get someone to break up with you

To be honest, you shouldn’t try to get someone to break up with you. If you really want to end things, you should approach them directly and talk about it with them. That way, you’re not playing with their emotions. But I can’t make those decisions for you.

If you don’t want to face them, you should know that you’re acting like a huge coward. Of course, there are other ways to dump someone. They’re not nice but people use them.

After this break up though, you should take a break from dating. If you can’t break up with them properly, you shouldn’t be dating.

#1 Give the relationship space. Listen, if you want them to break up with you, you’re going to have to show that you’re distancing yourself from it. It’s a shitty move, but it gives a strong hint.

Try not to spend so much time around your partner, slow down the number of calls and texts you send out to them. Overall, just take a step back from the relationship. They’ll notice. [Read: How to tell someone to leave you alone and get out of your space]

#2 Stop bringing up the future. When you’re in a happy relationship, you’re always talking about future plans. But, if you want to end it, cut all talks about the future. They may be making plans with you for future events, but you need to not commit to anything. You can mention things with your friends, but do not include them. Oh god, this is cold. [Read: Understanding the psychology of ignoring someone]

#3 Minimize affection. If you’re still sleeping with them, holding their hand, and telling them that you love them, you’re leading them on. So, you need to cut out all signs of affection. Yes, you’re going to look like a cold asshole, you should know that. Can’t you just tell them you don’t want to be with them? It would be so much easier.

#4 Tell them you need space. Well, this is a pretty obvious one when it comes to knowing how to get someone to break up with you. If you literally tell them that you need space from them, it’s a strong sign that a storm is coming in their direction. They should get the hint that you’re not happy with them and will hopefully end things with you or at least confront you on it. I’m telling you, this is more difficult than it needs to be. [Read: 25 tips to end a relationship without a messy struggle]

#5 Complain. About anything. Just complain and complain and complain and literally drive them away with your complaining. No one wants to be with a Debbie Downer, and right now, that’s what you have to play. Just try not to get sucked into your new annoying character. See, this is gonna backfire!

#6 Talk about your ex. No one wants to be with someone who’s not over their ex. So, start talking about them. Mention their name in conversation, memories you have with them, and regrets over ending it. They’ll start to question whether you’re actually over your ex or not. Which is good for you, even though it’s a complete fabrication. [Read: Why using this dating tactic makes you a jerk]

#7 Comment about their friends and family. Now, don’t insult their friends and family to the point where you’re blacklisted from your community, but people become very defensive over who they hang out with, obviously.

If you don’t fit in with their friends and if their family doesn’t like you, you’re not going to be around for too much longer. That’s what you wanted, right?

#8 Act single. Now, ideally, you could be acting single already if you just made the move to break up with them before starting all this drama, but no, now you’re here and we have to deal with it. If your social media looks like you’re single and you act like you’re single, well, not much is stopping you from being single, right? [Read: Should you really break up? 17 signs you’re past the point of no return]

#9 Have more “me time.” You need them to realize that you’re selfish. Because let’s face it, if you’re reading about how to get someone to break up with you, you are. But if they’re able to see your behavior and label it as selfishness then they’ll be more inclined to end the relationship. Do more things that you want to do on your own without their opinion or consultation.

#10 Social media is key. If you’re always posting photos of you and your partner – stop. You can’t try to break up the relationship when you’re still acting like you’re together. No, you need to completely change your behavior.

Stop posting pictures and videos, stop tagging them, stop commenting on their posts. Just stop everything. [Read: The lowdown on social media and relationships]

#11 Tell friends. Gossip flies around fast, and if you tell the right people who have a big mouth, your partner will eventually catch on to the news that you’re looking to break up with them. Naturally, no one wants to be dumped, so they’ll run to make the first move.

[Read: The breakup conversation you can use to break up with your partner]

Listen, the best way to break up with someone is talk to them and be honest. It’s hard, but they will respect you versus learning how to get someone to break up with you instead.