The 12 Biggest and Yet Subtle Signs You’re Being Taken for Granted

You love your partner, but you feel like a used mop. Instead of feeling good around your partner, you see signs you’re being taken for granted.

They say a little appreciation goes a long way. When it comes to relationships, they weren’t joking. Whether you’ve been with your partner for years or months, you’re starting to feel like they don’t appreciate you. Maybe you see the signs you’re being taken for granted or you’re just not sure.

Now, I can tell you that they do appreciate you, but I don’t know. They can appreciate you but aren’t showing it or they could just be using your kindness for their own gains.

Relationships are tricky. Whatever you do, whether it’s making them their favorite meal as a surprise, taking their dog out for a walk or visiting them when they’re sick, it seems like they don’t notice the effort you put into the relationship. [Read: Are you confusing being love bombed with the real thing?]

Do you see these signs you’re being taken for granted?

After a while, their lack of acknowledgment of your actions is a mood killer. It makes you feel used, like you’re just spending your time serving your partner’s needs.

But it takes two people to make a relationship, right? It’s great that you’re showing love and kindness, but what about you? Are your needs being met? Yeah, that was a rhetorical question—we all know the answer.

But you may be hesitant to face the truth. I get it—it’s not an easy thing to accept. Check out these signs you’re being taken for granted, and they’ll give you a clearer idea of what’s going on in your relationship. If these signs match your relationship, time to speak up. [Read: 16 reasons why everyone always takes you for granted]

#1 Thank you is a foreign term. You’ve never really heard your partner say that phrase, at least not to you. You bust your ass making your partner happy, doing little things that make them smile with delight, but they never say thank you.

It’s almost as though they expected you to do it. Whether they see it as a norm or not, saying thank you shows appreciation. Something they don’t do. [Read: Why you should run if you see these red flags in your relationship]

#2 They don’t do their share of the chores. I know this may sound juvenile, but probably because you don’t live with your partner yet. If you did, you’d know exactly what I’m saying.

They simply don’t help you out with anything. You do all the cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping, and laundry. You can be a control freak, but your partner should still make the effort in helping you out. [Read: Unassuming signs you’re dating a jerk]

#3 They don’t treat you. It could be your birthday or the day you got a promotion at work, but for them, it’s just a Tuesday. Sure, they congratulate you but other then that, you’re not getting anything else. You haven’t complained about not getting anything for your anniversary, so why would they start buying you gifts now? It’s not like you’re going to leave them.

#4 They don’t ask for your opinion. Weird, right? Usually, when we’re in a relationship, we hold that person’s opinion highly, asking them for their thoughts and advice when we’re confronted with an issue. Now they don’t necessarily need to ask for your advice or opinion, but are they the ones making the decisions or is it a joint process?

#5 Your sad face makes them walk away. We all have moments where we had a bad day or something traumatic happened, and we need our partner. But your crying face isn’t their thing, so you better come back to them when you feel better. If they don’t lend a hand when you need support, they don’t appreciate you. [Read: The partner checklist to know if one partner is being taken for granted]

#6 You’re not included in plans. They make plans, they’re capable of that, but they don’t include you in them. They may tell you a couple of hours before, but they’re not inviting you out with them. They didn’t even ask you what you’re doing. See, there was no thought about you during the planning process. You’re on your own, baby.

#7 They’re not romantic. Okay, some people don’t have a romantic bone in their body, but they go the extra mile because they know their partner loves romantic gestures. See the difference? Their partner took the extra step to make them happy – that shows appreciation. Your partner isn’t going out of their way to make you smile with a candlelit dinner. [Read: 10 signs you’re dating a self-obsessed narcissist]

#8 You find things out on social media. Your partner went out last night but you found that out the next morning on Facebook. There’s no communication. Your partner assumes that you’re fine with whatever they do. You’re an afterthought to their actions. If they appreciated you, they’d tell you beforehand of what their plans are, and invite you.

#9 No PDA. When someone appreciates you, they show it. That could be through small gestures, gifts, and physical affection. Now, they don’t need to dry hump you in the middle of the street to show appreciation, but they’re proud and value you as a partner by holding your hand or kissing you in public. [Read: 13 signs you’re always too easily available for your partner]

#10 They don’t compliment you. You have a new haircut, bought a new shirt, or whatever it is, it doesn’t matter. The point is you could wear a potato sack and they wouldn’t say anything.

They don’t give you compliments or praise you when you do something outstanding. If they cannot give you a genuine compliment on their own, you’re not on their mind as someone significant.

#11 They don’t see you. No, it’s not because they’re blind. They simply don’t acknowledge your presence. You get a better hello from your dog than you do from your partner. That’s a problem. You should be the first person on their mind when they think of anything. I know this sounds pretentious, but it’s not, it’s called love. [Read: How to make a guy realize he’s losing you – 13 hints that really work]

#12 You nag them. You spend time correcting the behavior of your partner, but you don’t see much change. You ask them to help you with cleaning or you make the first move when it comes to PDA, but they’re simply not catching on. Listen, if they really wanted to, they would. They don’t appreciate you, and that’s it.

[Read: 16 more convincing signs your partner is clearly taking you for granted]

Sometimes, we simply become too comfortable with our partners and take advantage of their kindness and love. But if you see the signs you’re being taken for granted, it’s time to speak up.