Turn Him on and Get Him Going: How to Talk Dirty to Your Man

So, you want to up the spiciness in the bedroom with your man. Well, start by learning how to talk dirty to your man. Not sure how? We have you covered.

No one said dirty talking was easy. For many of us, we’re not used to it, so it doesn’t come as naturally. But this doesn’t mean anything really. If you want to learn how to talk dirty to your man, no one is stopping you. In fact, we’re here to help you through the way.

Like myself, most of us learn how to dirty talk through trial and error. Listening to our friends talk to guys, watching movies, and testing the limits ourselves. Let me tell ya, I wish I had an article to read when I was younger, that would have saved me from so much humiliation. [Read: A naughty guide to sext your boyfriend and leave him yearning]

How to talk dirty to your man

Now, most women think we always push the limits in order for a man to stay interested in us. Thinking of something even more sexual or more arousing to say to them, but it isn’t like that. You could say one or two words and still get the same reaction as you would by sending an essay of explicit material.

This is why you’re here, to learn the best way to dirty talk to your man. Because sometimes, it’s a lot easier than what we think it is. Here’s what you need to do

#1 Relax. Of course, it’s easier said than done. If this is your first-time dirty texting your man then you’re nervous. But listen, there’s no reason to be nervous. If this is your first time, it is probably their first time as well. So, you are basically on equal playing fields. If you’re really nervous, then maybe you should rethink this. It could be you’re not ready and that’s okay. [Read: How to start sexting when you’ve never done it before]

#2 You say what you want. Dirty talking is basically an “in” on the type of sexual experiences you like. You give your partner a sexy guidebook that they, if smart, should follow. Dirty talking is telling your partner what you want to do to them or with them before actually doing it. This is also the opportunity for them to tell you what they like and what they’d like to do to you. Maybe you are or are not compatible.

#3 Be you. When it comes to learning how to talk dirty to your man, please don’t make the mistake of trying to act like you like certain things because they like it. No, no, no. You need to be you and when you’re dirty talking your man, if you aren’t vibing with what they’re saying, then don’t go along with it. Make sure you speak your mind because they do not read minds. [Read: How to unfake your life and embrace you]

#4 Ease into it. Don’t just all of a sudden start with dirty talking, especially if it’s your first time doing it with your partner. Start by flirting and then slowly building up the intensity. For example, if he says he’s in bed, you can reply by saying, “You know what I’d do if I was there beside you?” This alerts him what he’s in for, so he has a moment to prepare. It’ll catch him off guard, but he’ll get into the mood.

#5 Use description. Men are visual, so, you want to make sure that when your dirty talking, you use a lot of description. Don’t be scared to go into detail of what you’d like him to do to you or you do to him. With description, he’ll be able to have a visual in his mind of you and that’s exactly what you want. Now, this doesn’t mean to use big words, keep it simple.

#6 Make use of the five senses. You have five of them for a reason, so make sure you use every one of them. If you want to get the vibe between you two, then you should be using multi-sensory descriptive words. Of course, you’ll use sight and touch, but those aren’t the only senses you have. Talk about sounds, taste, and smell. Don’t leave anything out.

#7 Don’t swear too much. When it comes to knowing how to talk dirty to your man, maybe I’m biased but if you swear too much, it kinda kills the sensuality between you. For sure, you can swear but don’t overdo it. There are certain words which actually turn people off when you use them in a sexual manner. Not everyone likes being called a bitch or whore, so if you’re going to say these words, check in with them if they’re okay with it.

#8 You can start by texting. Texting is usually the easiest way to get into dirty talking if you’re not used to doing it. Plus, you have more time to think about what you want to say and reply back to them, so, overall, it’s a less stressful situation. And, you can test the waters by doing it via text. Make a comment about having a shower, or how you can’t stop thinking about them. Curving into the dirty talk from there. [Read: How to learn to send your boyfriend steamy texts]

#9 Match the words with your body. If you’re in front of your partner, you want to match the words with your body language. Don’t just stand there talking dirty without any physical emotion, it’s not quite believable. You can run your hand through his hair, rub up against him, bite his lip. Show him that you mean what you say.

#10 Slow it down. It’s normal that when you’re aroused, you want to speed things up and get to the point. But, you shouldn’t do it. Instead, pay close attention to the speed and try to slow down. This will also build up your confidence and sexual tension which is what you want. Talk slow, move slow, and build up the tension between you.

#11 The tone changes everything. The tone of your voice can be a very powerful tool when you dirty talk. A deep and soulful tone builds up the sexual tension and sensuality between you two. A higher pitch voice also works to arouse him. You can play around with this and see what he reacts to the best.

#12 Talk about your body. When you’re dirty talking, if you want him to bounce off the walls, talk about your body. Talk about your breasts, stomach, ass, and vagina. You can say things like, “I want you in between my legs,” “I want you to have this pussy.” “Spank me, baby,” “I love seeing you eat my pussy.”

These are just some examples. But when you talk about your body, they imagine themselves around you, doing those things. [Read: How to dirty talk and turn your lover on like no one else can]

#13 Practice makes perfect. No one said this will just fly out of your mouth like a stick of butter. You must practice, especially if you’re not comfortable. You may want to practice even prior to dirty talking your man. You can always talk to him and tell him that you’re not experienced with dirty talking. That way, he helps you out and guides you.

[Read: 20+ beginner dirty talk examples to get you started]

Now that you know how to talk dirty to your man, there’s only one thing left that you need to do–talk dirty to him! It takes some practice, but after a while, it’ll just flow out of you.